February 19, 2011

Being healthy is a constant struggle...

Currently, I am dealing with the death of my best friend; and, you can say that I haven't really been handling it too well. Sure I look at life differently now and want to seize the day, everyday. But emotionally, I am still in a place of mourning, while having to care about school and work. A part of me is gone and I will never get it back.

I've been doing the unhealthy thing and binge eating. I go days with eating one big meal a day, but then stuff my face with all types of carb confections on the weekend as I lay in bed watching Law & Order: SVU reruns. Too bad that's not how it should be. Life has to go on.

My poor eating habits and poor exercise routine is contributing to my low energy, but really, I don't feel like doing anything anyway. I'm numb and I have lost interest in all the things I love. Having to pretend to care about certain aspects of my life (school, fashion) that play a GIANT role in it is exhausting, because I am not very good at faking emotions.

So, starting tomorrow I am going to channel my sadness into healthy habits like yoga and nutritious meals.

I need to feel better and this is the first step.

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